you need to stop dragging the "better person" tag with women who opted for abortion.
There was a time the both of you were in the same exact situation and you both had to make a choice. You chose to carry the pregnancy to full term, while she decided to terminate hers.
Several years later, you are angry. You are angry because she is living a good life, while you are struggling. She finished school, got a good job and is set to marry the kind of man you have always wanted for yourself. You on the other hand are stuck with a child, plenty bills and an unsupportive family. The only men who approach you for marriage are either divorced, polygamous or simply too old. The bachelors who seek your hand in marriage do not want you to bring your child along with you into your matrimonial home. You are resentful because you believe that life should have rewarded you for making the moral choice and punished her for committing an immoral act.
But let's be honest. You knew the kind of society you live in. You were not oblivious of the kind of family and neighbours you have. You went ahead and made your choice knowing full well that you would have had to face serious consequences for having a child out of wedlock.
Perhaps, even though the two of you made very legitimate choices, hers was the smarter choice.
You might even resent your child now, for all the opportunities that you missed because of him or her. But let me ask you: who forced you?
I know for sure that I do not want kids and have secured myself to make sure that it doesn't happen. However, if life decides to play a trick on me and I get pregnant, I am opting for abortion without thinking twice.
You don't have children just to prove your moral superiority, neither do you have children in the hope that life will reward you for bringing forth a life.
There are many single mothers who have it good, but it turned out that way for them because they made plans; they weighed their options and their capability before deciding to have their child.
Nobody owes you anything.
Next time, be sure you are ready for whatever life has in mind for you before you make the decision of having a child out of wedlock in a society as intolerant as Nigeria.
What you think is the good choice is not always the right choice.
Kind Regards,
A pro-choice woman.
There was a time the both of you were in the same exact situation and you both had to make a choice. You chose to carry the pregnancy to full term, while she decided to terminate hers.
Several years later, you are angry. You are angry because she is living a good life, while you are struggling. She finished school, got a good job and is set to marry the kind of man you have always wanted for yourself. You on the other hand are stuck with a child, plenty bills and an unsupportive family. The only men who approach you for marriage are either divorced, polygamous or simply too old. The bachelors who seek your hand in marriage do not want you to bring your child along with you into your matrimonial home. You are resentful because you believe that life should have rewarded you for making the moral choice and punished her for committing an immoral act.
But let's be honest. You knew the kind of society you live in. You were not oblivious of the kind of family and neighbours you have. You went ahead and made your choice knowing full well that you would have had to face serious consequences for having a child out of wedlock.
Perhaps, even though the two of you made very legitimate choices, hers was the smarter choice.
You might even resent your child now, for all the opportunities that you missed because of him or her. But let me ask you: who forced you?
I know for sure that I do not want kids and have secured myself to make sure that it doesn't happen. However, if life decides to play a trick on me and I get pregnant, I am opting for abortion without thinking twice.
You don't have children just to prove your moral superiority, neither do you have children in the hope that life will reward you for bringing forth a life.
There are many single mothers who have it good, but it turned out that way for them because they made plans; they weighed their options and their capability before deciding to have their child.
Nobody owes you anything.
Next time, be sure you are ready for whatever life has in mind for you before you make the decision of having a child out of wedlock in a society as intolerant as Nigeria.
What you think is the good choice is not always the right choice.
Kind Regards,
A pro-choice woman.
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