1. Maturity
Maturity is when all the big 5 traits of your personality have reached a state of stability.
These are openness, conscientiousness, extraversion, agreeableness and neuroticism.
When choosing your friends, you might want to go for people who score high or low in the trait you think is the most important to you.
If you are high in openness, you might want someone who is as open as you are. And if you are the type that worries too much, you might want to have someone who does not worry a lot.
2. Intelligence
I personally rank intelligence more than education. That someone is educated does not mean that they are also intelligent. We have a lot of stupid people with degrees in the world.
Intelligence is the ability to observe, understand, process and re-elaborate information.
Intelligent people are the ones who proffer solutions to problems. They are analytical, pragmatic and practical. They might not always give you the answer to all your questions, but they always drop one or two important clues.
An intelligent person is the kind of person who can change your perception about life within a few months of being friends. You find yourself paying more attention to details you had always neglected and understanding more of the people and environment around you.
3. Financial independence
When you are in your thirties, you should have it all together, at least at the minimum level of comfort. You don't want to depend on people, you don't want people depending on you.
You need a friend who can handle their own part of the bill when you go out. Perhaps they could also offer to take you out on a treat.
Life can be unpredictable. if you help your friends in times of need, they should also be able to help you in your time of need.
4. Similar purpose
If you are a person who has strong ideologies and is an idealist, you might want to mingle with people who share your ideologies and ideas, or at least support them.
There is nothing fun about being the "crazy" one among your friends. The only one who always asks questions, challenges the status quo and is willing to risk it all just for the sake of doing the right thing.
Take it from someone who has always been the crazy one.
You need friends who understand you when you speak and understand the passion behind your ideas.
Do away with those friends who benefit from your "troublesome" attitude, but silently judge you for it.
5. Good character
Even people with a horrible character want friends with a good character. Nobody wants to be at the receiving end of any mishaps, even those who dish them out regularly
Everybody loves a loyal, honest, kind, generous, compassionate person.
Do not mistake a calm personality for a good character and do not think that an eccentric personality is an indication of a bad character.
From my personal experience, those people who rarely speak or attract attention are some of the worst human beings I have ever met in my life.
The truth is you will never get to know a person's real character until life happens.
6. Reciprocation
Give and take. This is the rule to building a balanced and long lasting relationship.
You have every right to have expectations if you are the kind of person who gives without reservation. Do not accept disappointments as the norm. Do not make excuses for your friends when they fail you.
It's a friendship, not a worship. Your friends are not doing you a favour by being friends with you. Don't put them on a pedestal, while they constantly walk all over you.
If they cannot be there for you, like you have been there for them, let them go.
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Friends come and go, like most things in life. And when you get to your thirties, you should have a clear idea of who you are and what you want. This idea must reflect in your friends.
Some friendships have an expiration date. Do not be afraid to cut them loose.
You might have only one friend who will accompany you for the rest of your life. It's all right.
Friendship has never been about quantity, but quality.
Maturity is when all the big 5 traits of your personality have reached a state of stability.
These are openness, conscientiousness, extraversion, agreeableness and neuroticism.
When choosing your friends, you might want to go for people who score high or low in the trait you think is the most important to you.
If you are high in openness, you might want someone who is as open as you are. And if you are the type that worries too much, you might want to have someone who does not worry a lot.
2. Intelligence
I personally rank intelligence more than education. That someone is educated does not mean that they are also intelligent. We have a lot of stupid people with degrees in the world.
Intelligence is the ability to observe, understand, process and re-elaborate information.
Intelligent people are the ones who proffer solutions to problems. They are analytical, pragmatic and practical. They might not always give you the answer to all your questions, but they always drop one or two important clues.
An intelligent person is the kind of person who can change your perception about life within a few months of being friends. You find yourself paying more attention to details you had always neglected and understanding more of the people and environment around you.
3. Financial independence
When you are in your thirties, you should have it all together, at least at the minimum level of comfort. You don't want to depend on people, you don't want people depending on you.
You need a friend who can handle their own part of the bill when you go out. Perhaps they could also offer to take you out on a treat.
Life can be unpredictable. if you help your friends in times of need, they should also be able to help you in your time of need.
4. Similar purpose
If you are a person who has strong ideologies and is an idealist, you might want to mingle with people who share your ideologies and ideas, or at least support them.
There is nothing fun about being the "crazy" one among your friends. The only one who always asks questions, challenges the status quo and is willing to risk it all just for the sake of doing the right thing.
Take it from someone who has always been the crazy one.
You need friends who understand you when you speak and understand the passion behind your ideas.
Do away with those friends who benefit from your "troublesome" attitude, but silently judge you for it.
5. Good character
Even people with a horrible character want friends with a good character. Nobody wants to be at the receiving end of any mishaps, even those who dish them out regularly
Everybody loves a loyal, honest, kind, generous, compassionate person.
Do not mistake a calm personality for a good character and do not think that an eccentric personality is an indication of a bad character.
From my personal experience, those people who rarely speak or attract attention are some of the worst human beings I have ever met in my life.
The truth is you will never get to know a person's real character until life happens.
6. Reciprocation
Give and take. This is the rule to building a balanced and long lasting relationship.
You have every right to have expectations if you are the kind of person who gives without reservation. Do not accept disappointments as the norm. Do not make excuses for your friends when they fail you.
It's a friendship, not a worship. Your friends are not doing you a favour by being friends with you. Don't put them on a pedestal, while they constantly walk all over you.
If they cannot be there for you, like you have been there for them, let them go.
------------
Friends come and go, like most things in life. And when you get to your thirties, you should have a clear idea of who you are and what you want. This idea must reflect in your friends.
Some friendships have an expiration date. Do not be afraid to cut them loose.
You might have only one friend who will accompany you for the rest of your life. It's all right.
Friendship has never been about quantity, but quality.
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