Written 28/05/2018
Nigerians are angry that Linda is pregnant.
Some are angry because the pregnancy occurred outside marriage and honestly, I'm not bothered with these lots. They are just a bunch of fools. Men ,who hate to see women who are not "under a man", and women, who believe marriage validates their existence, are not the type of human beings to whom I like to waste my time to explain things.
But for those who are angry because Linda had preached celibacy in the past, I will spare a few minutes to explain why you can't call Linda a hypocrite.
The original quote goes as follows: "I preached celibacy to young girls because I feel that’s the right way to live until you meet someone very special that you love and who loves you and wants to be in a committed relationship with you. Passing body around and having multiple partners is not the way and I stand by it.
“And I’ve lived by it. But then I turned 36 and I knew there was nothing else I wanted more than to be a mum & wife and celibacy wasn’t going to get me that! I even did a video talking about how much I wanted these two things and God has finally answered my prayers. Beyond blessed."
In my opinion, her message was valid, honest and for a specific group of women.
We all know how majority of Nigerian women like to accuse men of using them and dumping them whenever a relationship goes sour. Nigerian women expect every sexual encounter to turn into a relationship which will eventually end in marriage. Even those who are dating married men or men who are officially involved with another woman, still hope that these men will change their mind someday and decide to make an "honest" woman out of them.
Linda's message was for this group of women: women who want something stable and possibly permanent. She also made it clear that you could break your celibacy once you had found that special someone.
I do not agree with her opinion on being sexually active and having multiple sexual partners. I believe that, as long as you are not cheating, stringing anybody along or practising unsafe sex, you can sleep with as many people as you want. Your vagina won't slack and your penis won't shrink. But, I suppose, that in our society, sexuality is still not something that is well seen when it's being expressed by a woman. That is their problem, though, not mine and not that of any woman who wants to be sexually adventurous and have as many orgasms as she can before she decides it's time to settle down: that is if she wishes.
Linda was celibate until last year, then she realised that time was also passing by. So she decided to put an end to her celibacy and go for what she had always wanted and I see nothing wrong in that. I read somewhere that she was scared of menopause. Silly people. Having a child in your 20s or 30s is a lot different from having a child in your 40s. I think at 40, most people want to be doing other things rather than changing diapers and doing school runs. Human beings age and get tired. There are a lot of men, as well, who don't want to hear anything kids once they clock 40. So it's not just a woman's thing alone.
Linda is currently engaged and pregnant. There are speculations that she could also be married traditionally. Her family, friends and staff members hid something as obvious as a pregnancy for 6 months, so a traditional wedding wouldn't be far-fetched.
If you are like Linda, you want to get married and have children, and you do not want to waste your time with meaningless sex and relationships, you can follow her advice and lock up until you find the person whom you think might be the one.
I believe a lot of people, likewise me, are honestly tired of reading posts by Nigerian women on how a one night stand did not become the love of their life.
I didn't take Linda's advice. As a matter of fact, I didn't even know she had said something like that until the news of her pregnancy broke out. And even if I had known, I still wouldn't have given it much importance because I do not belong to the group of women whom she was addressing.
But if you belong to that group, be smart and emulate this young woman. She knew what she was doing all along: when love wasn't coming forth, she explored past options. I would say, if you don't have any past options either, get your ass up and go and look for love. There is nothing wrong or desperate in knowing what you want and going for it.
Fuck what society says.
So, my dear women, if you are still shouting about how Linda is a hypocrite and should have announced to the world that she was no longer celibate, then you are just silly.
Besides, why would a grown up woman look up to another woman (or man) who doesn't even know of her existence to live her life and make her decisions? It's not that Linda's advice impacted Nigeria's disastrous politics and economy. In fact we are still poor and hopeless, while she is stinking rich and living her dream.
So please, stop being a pathetic whiner. Linda doesn't care about you. Stop caring about Linda.
Nigerians are angry that Linda is pregnant.
Some are angry because the pregnancy occurred outside marriage and honestly, I'm not bothered with these lots. They are just a bunch of fools. Men ,who hate to see women who are not "under a man", and women, who believe marriage validates their existence, are not the type of human beings to whom I like to waste my time to explain things.
But for those who are angry because Linda had preached celibacy in the past, I will spare a few minutes to explain why you can't call Linda a hypocrite.
The original quote goes as follows: "I preached celibacy to young girls because I feel that’s the right way to live until you meet someone very special that you love and who loves you and wants to be in a committed relationship with you. Passing body around and having multiple partners is not the way and I stand by it.
“And I’ve lived by it. But then I turned 36 and I knew there was nothing else I wanted more than to be a mum & wife and celibacy wasn’t going to get me that! I even did a video talking about how much I wanted these two things and God has finally answered my prayers. Beyond blessed."
In my opinion, her message was valid, honest and for a specific group of women.
We all know how majority of Nigerian women like to accuse men of using them and dumping them whenever a relationship goes sour. Nigerian women expect every sexual encounter to turn into a relationship which will eventually end in marriage. Even those who are dating married men or men who are officially involved with another woman, still hope that these men will change their mind someday and decide to make an "honest" woman out of them.
Linda's message was for this group of women: women who want something stable and possibly permanent. She also made it clear that you could break your celibacy once you had found that special someone.
I do not agree with her opinion on being sexually active and having multiple sexual partners. I believe that, as long as you are not cheating, stringing anybody along or practising unsafe sex, you can sleep with as many people as you want. Your vagina won't slack and your penis won't shrink. But, I suppose, that in our society, sexuality is still not something that is well seen when it's being expressed by a woman. That is their problem, though, not mine and not that of any woman who wants to be sexually adventurous and have as many orgasms as she can before she decides it's time to settle down: that is if she wishes.
Linda was celibate until last year, then she realised that time was also passing by. So she decided to put an end to her celibacy and go for what she had always wanted and I see nothing wrong in that. I read somewhere that she was scared of menopause. Silly people. Having a child in your 20s or 30s is a lot different from having a child in your 40s. I think at 40, most people want to be doing other things rather than changing diapers and doing school runs. Human beings age and get tired. There are a lot of men, as well, who don't want to hear anything kids once they clock 40. So it's not just a woman's thing alone.
Linda is currently engaged and pregnant. There are speculations that she could also be married traditionally. Her family, friends and staff members hid something as obvious as a pregnancy for 6 months, so a traditional wedding wouldn't be far-fetched.
If you are like Linda, you want to get married and have children, and you do not want to waste your time with meaningless sex and relationships, you can follow her advice and lock up until you find the person whom you think might be the one.
I believe a lot of people, likewise me, are honestly tired of reading posts by Nigerian women on how a one night stand did not become the love of their life.
I didn't take Linda's advice. As a matter of fact, I didn't even know she had said something like that until the news of her pregnancy broke out. And even if I had known, I still wouldn't have given it much importance because I do not belong to the group of women whom she was addressing.
But if you belong to that group, be smart and emulate this young woman. She knew what she was doing all along: when love wasn't coming forth, she explored past options. I would say, if you don't have any past options either, get your ass up and go and look for love. There is nothing wrong or desperate in knowing what you want and going for it.
Fuck what society says.
So, my dear women, if you are still shouting about how Linda is a hypocrite and should have announced to the world that she was no longer celibate, then you are just silly.
Besides, why would a grown up woman look up to another woman (or man) who doesn't even know of her existence to live her life and make her decisions? It's not that Linda's advice impacted Nigeria's disastrous politics and economy. In fact we are still poor and hopeless, while she is stinking rich and living her dream.
So please, stop being a pathetic whiner. Linda doesn't care about you. Stop caring about Linda.
No comments:
Post a Comment