BRINGING YOUR WIFE ABROAD AND PAYING FOR A CERTIFICATION IS NOT A FAVOUR.

I can see that many people ignore the meaning and importance of marriage, and that tells me that they also underestimate the amount of efforts it takes to work out.

When you marry a person, you become a single unit with that person under the law. You are counted as a family, and whatever benefit you are supposed to enjoy is given to you as a family.

Your decision to invest in your spouse, unless stated otherwise is not counted as an individual investment. If you want it to be so, then make the spouse sign a contract that clearly says "This is a loan and I want you to pay back in so so ways", otherwise forget it.

You cannot compare a person's decision to bring their husband or wife abroad and pay for their diploma, to Amaka's decision to invest in her friend's business. The first is a gift from a spouse to another, counted also as spousal responsibility, the second is a purely a business transaction. And even in this case Amaka has to prove that she didn't gift Uche that money.

If I were a woman who was sponsored abroad. Sorry. I am a woman who was sponsored abroad. My mother brought me over to Italy when I was ten years old, and I remember the number of times she held it over my head.

"I could have left you in Nigeria. I can send you back to Nigeria. I could chase you out of this house."

No, she couldn't. The law does not consider her bringing me over to Italy a favour she did me. Instead it sees it as her fulfilling a parental obligation. And that is the same between husband and wife. I mean, why shouldn't a husband and wife be living together? You making efforts to bring your family together under the same roof is seen as you making efforts to make your marriage work. For your own personal benefit too.

You cannot throw your spouse out of the house because you brought him or her over. You cannot demand their salary either. You cannot enslave them in any way or deny them their fundamental rights. I mean, you cannot do this with a stranger who has no ties with you. That is tantamount to human trafficking. So, why do you think you can do this with a spouse?

If you do not want to perform that kind of spousal responsibility, then don't get married. Unless you don't rate marriage and you are OK with allowing your husband or wife to rot away in a third world country while you live as a single person in a first world country.